Let’s get reflective

At this time of year it’s impossible to avoid the media offering recaps of the past 12 months. Radio stations will be playing their top 100s of 2005, stores will be selling the obligatory cash-in CDs.

So, before all this is forgotten in a wave of new year Slim Fast adverts and those ‘free binder with part one’ magazines, allow me to point you to two of my own finds.

First up, we have the Top 50 Inventions of the last 50 years. Far be it from me to shun another site on the grounds of it being ‘geeky’ I have to confess to never reading or visiting Popular Mechanics. I suspect this won’t change in the future either.

Coming in second we have TV Cream’s Top 100 Toys. This is a wonderfully humourous, nostalgic and distinctly British listing of toys and games from an era when Rupert the Bear, Captain Pugwash and Bagpuss were all part of every child’s TV viewing. I imagine the over 20’s will get the most from this listing and from the wonderful TV Cream site itself.

If, like my 5 and 8 year old nephew and niece, you got a PSP or other expensive gizmo for Christmas then that second list will, I hope, allow you to sympathise with the older generation when they scold you with that timeless classic “You young ‘uns – you don’t know how lucky you are!!”

Happy New Year!

Some self analysis

So, for reasons I don’t particularly feel like going into, I had a fairly interesting weekend. Let’s just say I got a little mental workout and some late nights. Sometimes things happen and, even when you’ve told yourself you’re finished with them, they linger around your psyche for a while. When this happens I tend to reflect and make an attempt to understand what’s going on – almost like I’m trying to communicate with that big chunk of our brain that we don’t use. It’s like it’s got the answer to something about me and I have to prod it a bit for it to give me some hints. I’ve done this to myself a number of times in the past and I’ve always learned some important things – and in some cases, made some life-changing decisions.

To anyone that knows me online and has encountered me on gaming forums they probably know I’m quite a ‘take no prisoners’ guy, really stubborn and often come accross as a grumpy old man. My demeanour on instant messengers and in person tends to surprise people that only know me from forums as I’m fairly mellow and good natured (with dashes of seething rage thrown in on occasions).

So why are you such a grumpy sod on forums then Koffdrop?

Good question. The short answer is that, by the time I’ve read the whole topic in question and ready to make a reply I’m angry with all the dumb stuff that I’ve read in it. I don’t frequent gaming forums as much as I used to (understatement of the year) so I normally have a lot more to catch up when I eventually meander over and read a topic that catches my eye. Now, I try to make a point of reading an entire topic before I respond to it – I think it’s good manners and also saves you from possibly making a prat of yourself by making an ignorant reply. I also don’t think it’s worth my time or of any value to a conversation if all I can really say is “I agree”. If I agree, I just move on to another topic. So it’s only when I have an alternative view that I respond – and I only respond when I’ve caught up on all the stuff in the topic. I guess you could liken it to taking a bottle of fizzy drink, shaking it more and more with each post I read and when I hit REPLY that’s the equivalent of unscrewing the cap – my vitriol gushes forth almost uncontrollably.

There’s a number of ways to deal with this. One is to only hang around the game forums that don’t have ‘dumb’ posters and topics. That, my friends, is easier said than done. There are only two gaming forums that I have seen in all my travels that have what I consider to be a decent level of maturity and insight . One got stained quite badly a few months back and, to me, has never fully recoverd. The other is so damn good that, frankly, I’m not worthy of making any posts there as I’m way out of my depth. The forum tends to be populated by game journalists and industry professionals. It’s a fascinating place to read and, like some secret garden, I don’t want to share it with many people in case it all goes south. Needless to say the feeling I get when reading the posts on that site is one of awe and inferiority rather than anger.

An alternate way of dealing with my ‘problem’ is to withdraw from forums altogether. This is the tactic I employ with a pretty high rate of success. The nature of websites these days is that it’s very difficult to read gaming news or culture commentary without also finding a shedload of comments underneath the article – which drags me perilously close to square one. There is no way in hell that I’m going to withdraw from the internet completely. I’m way too opinionated, love my downloads and love my gaming news too much to do that.

Of course, in my ideal world, there would be no dumb comments. Somehow I don’t think this is going to happen. Whilst I can police my own behaviour and make a change, I simply can’t do that for the rest of the online population – no matter how tempting the idea is. My problem lies in that I’ve spent some time in the magic circle that is the games industry and have even lived there for quite a few years. It’s a double edged sword. Whilst you may know how the magician does his tricks the knowledge you’ve gained means you’ll never enjoy those tricks the way you did before. Likewise, whenever you overhear non-magicians claiming to ‘know’ how or why this or that is done you can’t help but realise how far away from the truth of the matter they really are. Of course, it’s pretty insulting for a non magician to tell a magician to shut the hell up when he’s attempting to explain how and why some magic tricks work. It’s even more insulting for other non-magicians to support each other in approval of this dismissive behaviour with phrases like “pwned”

But that’s the internet for you – anyone can tell anyone else to shut the hell up.

Which is why it’s great to have your own site and commentary where you can say whatever you damn well please and not have to deal with feedback unless you want to. 🙂

Have a look at this

A couple of articles at Next Generation online make for some very interesting reading about the industry and what some of it’s most talented icons think about it.

Analysis: What That Deal Really Means
The Bioware / Pandemic / Elevation deal and what it means from the people involved.

I have bags of respect for Bioware and Pandemic. Their reputations are outstanding and their mentality and track record set a precedent that others can only dream of. Their plans benefit gamers as much as themselves.

Spector Slams “Insane” Costs
At the Montreal International Game Summit, Warren Spector has pleaded for more creativity and risk taking in game design while lamenting the high costs of making games.

When this man talks, you should listen. His talent and experience are simply unequalled and it’s nice to see the guy still retains a sense of humour.

I also find it interesting to get such earnest and relevant feedback on the industry from such knowledgeable and influential characters. Whilst a soundbite from Miyamoto is mana from heaven for your typical games journalist the guy doesn’t seem willing (or is not allowed) to get his hands on really earthy issues like these guys do.

Massive credit to Next Generation Online. Awesome stuff!

Dumb and Dumber

In the same way that you know picking a healing scab is wrong yet you still go ahead and do it, defying your own common sense and all those things your mother told you, I had a moment of weakness I recently dipped my toe back into the frothy waters of internet forums. I think it’s turned septic.

I left forums some time back for a number of reasons. One of the reasons was that I was tired of attempting to explain myself to an audience that was absolutely determined not to get the point. Usually, I was pointing out holes in their arguments or errors in their way of thinking or presenting themselves. So long as the audience persists in acting as though they don’t understand what I’m talking about they can comfortably convince themselves that they are free of criticism. It amounts to those simple magic tricks that depend on misdirection and distraction than genuine skill. Psychologists see this behaviour a great deal and it’s summed up by stating that until the individual admits there’s a need to change then they’ll never change. Typically, a person would speak to a psychologist and explain how the world doesn’t understand them. The psychologist will explain that the world is as it is – if things are to improve it’s the person who must change, not the rest of the world. I am, of course, over generalising the situation but, hey, I’m trying to make a point.

My recent contributions to a particular forum topic have left me feeling as if I’ve personally re-lived a scene from a certain movie:

Lloyd: What are the chances of a guy like you and a girl like me… ending up together?

Mary: Not good.

Lloyd: Not good like one in a hundred?

Mary: I’d say more like one in a million.

Lloyd: ……….So you’re telling me there’s a chance?

The scene is funny because, we, the audience are smarter than Lloyd and we can both laugh at his idiocy and empathise with his misplaced optimism. At the end of the day though, the poor sap just isn’t getting the point because his desire to believe something eclipses his grip on the facts of the situation.

I like that movie. It’s dumb fun. But I wouldn’t want to LIVE that movie and I certainly wouldn’t want to live out that scene ten times a day for weeks on end. It’d exasperate me to the point where I’d have to switch off and never watch the movie again. Fortunately for me, I switched off in time for me to keep my sanity and leave the Harry and Lloyds of the internet doing stuff like this:

Lloyd: You’re it.

Harry: You’re it.

Lloyd: You’re it, quitsies!

Harry: Anti-quitsies, you’re it, quitsies, no anti-quitsies, no startsies!

Lloyd: You can’t do that!

Harry: Can too!

Lloyd: Cannot, stamp it!

Harry: Can too, double stamp it, no erasies!

Lloyd: Cannot, triple stamp, no erasies, Touch blue make it true.

Harry: No, you can’t do that… you can’t triple stamp a double stamp, you can’t triple stamp a double stamp! Lloyd!

Lloyd: [hands over ears] LA LA LA LA LA LA!

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not against humour. I even enjoy watching some slapstick. But I don’t want to swim in a sea of idiocy. It’s a shame as the forum I refer to does have a great sense of commnity. Unfortunately it just comes accross me now as a really well organised clown convention. I’m sure it’s fantastic fun if clowns are your thing. If you can’t get enough of flowers that squirt water and garish characters tripping up over their own feet then I’m sure it’d be your idea of Nirvana. The thing is, I don’t find clowns funny any more – maybe when I was 6, but not now.

Also, I realised that clowns have no sense of humour. You ever tried to tell a clown that they’re not funny? It just doesn’t register. How dumb can you get?

The importance of being new

Isn’t it nice when you feel that a company is bending over backward to be nice to you?

Obviously, it doesn’t happen very often but it’s worth noting the times when it does: My mobile phone tariff is with 02, my service provider was Singlepoint. I didn’t have issues with either of them. Recently Vodafone bought Singlepoint and I became a customer in limbo. I would try to resolve a query with 02 and they’d direct me to Vodafone. Vodafone would direct me to 02. I felt very much unloved and like an outcast.

So I gathered some bills together and checked what I’d be paying, checked Voda’s tariffs and took my service off O2 and got the equivalent package with Vodafone. Now I’m no longer sitting on the fence and they kissed my feet and offered me this and that and lots of other tempting and shiny things that they didn’t need to. One of those shiny things is my new handset – the Sony w800i. Now, I’m not exactly out of touch with technology but this thing is NEAT. I’m very happy to have a $400+ phone given to me for free. Now, I just need to dig up all my great old game MP3s and load them into the phone’s 512mb memory and GEEK OUT!

Joystick Junkies – True Playerz – October ’05

It’ll be one of those ultra-rare times when I actually leave the house to do something vaguely sociable! I hadn’t heard of this until yesterday when a friend mentioned it to me. It’s a gaming tournament being held in London’s West End where the proceeds of the even go to the charity of the winner’s choosing. I’ve not been to any of the JJ organised events in the past but I know they’ve been around long enough to know how to do this sort of thing properly.

The entry cost is £5 for playerz or £3 for spectators. I’ll most definitely fall into the second category as I have difficulty beating a computer, let alone a motivated and skilled human opponent! However, I always enjoy a good display of solid gaming skills so I’m confident I’ll have a giggle.

I’m also really looking forward to meeting up with a handful of the folk that told me about this and rubbing shoulders with some people who’s opinions I respect and admire.

The Trueplayerz website can be found here.

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