Koffdrop talks Revolution

Right, before going any further let me just warn any readers that they might not like what they read in this post but that my opinions are mine. I don’t bleat with the rest of the herd and I don’t care for popular opinion. I do, however, give thought before I say something. Remember that last bit, it’s important.

I don’t have faith in Nintendo and I don’t have faith in their Revolution console or its controller. The thing about that machine is that, like the DS, it’s not aimed at gamers like me. Now, I personally don’t have a problem with that. Nintendo can and will do what they want to do. As a consumer, I’m free to make my choices and opinions about products I may or may not be interested in. Now, just because I say the system isn’t for me doesn’t mean to say I don’t understand what it’s trying to do.

It’s clear as day to most people that Nintendo are keen to broaden their market share. They’re going about this by attempting to attract different types of people – the non gamer. Sony succeeded with this back in the late 90’s by making the PlayStation a lifestyle product – just like Apple and iPod are doing today. Nintendo’s approach is different though. They’ve voiced their attitude towards long and complex games a number of times. With the unveiling of the Revolution controller they’ve declared how complex, button-laden controllers are off-putting to people who might otherwise be interested in playing games. The design of their controller demonstrates this perfectly.

Try this little experiment. Find someone you know who isn’t into gaming at all and generally ignores the whole deal. Now, ask them what they would be most comfortable using: a keyboard, a game controller or a TV remote. You’re likely to get option C every time. In essence, rather than make your product more attractive to the new market like Sony did with PlayStation, Nintendo are attempting to make their product less unattractive. This will remove barriers to sales of your product, it’s good. But it’s not good enough to draw people towards your product unless you have a more agressive approach to it to back it up. There’s a large amount of people who don’t play games because they don’t want to play games – not because controllers are offputting. In fact, where is there any evidence to suggest that this is the primary reason why non-gamers stay non-gamers?

To my knowledge, there isn’t any such evidence. To that end developing your next-generation of hardware around this concept at the cost of a conventional control system that can play regular games is extraordinarily risky. What Nintendo have done in their pursuit of the new demographic is to exclude a significant portion of the old one. The old demographic (the gamers) have been drifting away from Nintendo over the last ten years as sales of the N64 and Gamecube will testify. I am one of those gamers. I don’t seen Nintendo doing anything to lure me back to making them my primary gaming choice.

Admittedly, they’ve made an effort to keep existing gamers interested by claiming the Revolution will be host to every Nintendo console game ever made. Games from NES to Gamecube games are said to be workable with Revolution. Whilst this is an interesting prospect there is still a huge amount of information lacking as to how this will work. Whilst we’d all like to believe some sort of instant collection of great NES, SNES and N64 games will be available to us I can’t help thinking the reality will be far different. Nintendo have already given cagey feedback on the topic of free old games and suggested that these older titles may be used in incentives and rewards. I can’t say I blame them but I’ve got heaps of old Nintendo games for all my old Nintendo consoles. I even have the option of emulation if I wish to play them in a convenient manner. So the prospect of playing old Nintendo games really doesn’t do anything to pull me closer to the Revoltion whilst it’s controller pushes me away.

So what else does the Revolution offer me then? Well, clearly a whole different way of playing games and the potential to play in new and interesting ways. Potential is nice, but it’s rarely realised – even by Nintendo. We’ve all heard promises of next generation hardware or game engines. We’ve all waited and, in most cases, ended up disappointed. The DS is proving to be a fine example of potential that’s not been realised. The DS seemed, to me, to be one of Nintendo’s better ideas. One that might go the distance. It’s been very well received but we’re already seeing games fall back to regular controls. Only in a few cases (typically Nintendo and their first parties) are we seeing that DS potential realised. I already feel that the DS is declining into the same hole that the N64 and Gamecube are resting in – a machine that’s only being exploited by Nintendo themselves whilst 3rd parties just take the easy design route. And we’re talking about a machine that’s already outperformed against Nintendo’s other wacky inventions such as Virtualboy, Powerglove, R.O.B. and U-force. The U-force and the Revolution are worryingly close in concept and execution. Had you ever heard of the U-force? No, I thought not.

So, you can understand why I like the idea of ‘potential’ but I’m not convinced. The other aspect – a whole different way of playing games – doesn’t appeal to me in the slightest. I don’t own an eye-toy, a dance-mat, a light-gun, steering wheel controller or arcade stick. Oddly enough, I do own a snowboard shaped controller that you stand on and use your body weight to steer you through games like SSX. My wife and I received it as a Christmas present one year (due, no doubt, to our fixation with SSX at the time) but it’s never been used. The simple truth is, I don’t want to play games in a different way. I like the way I play games now, it works for me. It ain’t broke so why fix it? I’m not saying Nintendo’s idea is wrong but they’re offering me all these options that I don’t want and taking away the one I do.

And yes, I’m well aware of the peripheral addons that Nintendo have already hinted at and IGN have already mocked up. But I don’t buy console peripherals! And why the hell should I buy an add on just to get off the starting blocks to access regular games? And, more importantly, what is Nintendo’s mentality that they’re suggesting the Revolution is a system where expansion should become an accepted standard? This just makes the Revolution complicated. Want to play GAME-X? You need this addon. Want to play GAME-Y? you don’t. So much for keeping it simple! I expressed concern about making Xbox360 complex by releasing it in two flavours. This is of an equal concern. What really doesn’t sit well with me is Nintendo knowingly releasing an overly simplified and overly limited system – yet still pressing on regardless. Why should I pay through the nose to correct their design oversights?

Whilst the reception by all the third-party developers has been universally positive we won’t really see much as a result of this. There is no third-party on the planet that is going to dedicate a big chunk of its resources and finance onto boosting the Revolution’s reputation. Sure, they like the idea – but it’s something else to put your money where your mouth is. The best we’ll see is some crossover ports of games that have some sort of slightly modified gameplay – typically some sort of shooting-range concept. Third parties aren’t known for their innovation and that’s because they generally can’t afford to take big risks whilst they’re paying licence fees. They’d all love to work on their uber-game. The one with the great ideas that isn’t necessarily a big commercial prospect but the financial model of the gaming industry won’t let them.

The job falls to Nintendo. This is their responsibility and their making. Back in the 80s and 90s with the NES and SNES Nintendo had some very tight contracts with their licencees that forbade them to develop for other systems. This stifled creativity in that era. Machines that could have realised a developer’s idea were off limits. In that era, Nintendo was the company you wanted to keep grace with. Today, the situation is different – but Nintendo’s attitude is much the same. Nintendo were the ones that could afford to innovate and place tilt sensors in their games. It wasn’t because they were great and good and doing it for the player, it’s because they could afford to do it and elevate their status above third parties. Even though it was the licence fees paid by the third parties that allowed them to do this in the first place! Nintendo will innovate with the Revolution and if it proves to be THE machine to develop for then third parties will go for it. This is for Nintendo to prove, if they can do it, they’ll have the third party support. If they can’t – then it’s N64 and Gamecube all over again. Third parties don’t owe Nintendo anything and that has been shown with the N64 and Gamecube. The GBA has been different simply because it dominated the handheld market. If you wanted to make money and develop for handhelds, you did it for GBA. But the market is over-saturated with stale ‘me-too’ games, Nicklodeon licences and endless kart games. Once again, Nintendo are the ones who continue to make an effort because they’re the ones who can afford to.

I don’t see much in the way of depth offered by the control system of the Revolution. I see novelty ideas, party ideas and gimmicks. None of which appeal to me. They are niche games – they are the alternatives to regular gaming. They’re not the main event, they’re the support act. Once again, this may be fine for the market Nintendo is hoping to capture with their machine – but I’m not part of that market and I’m simply not interested. Nintendo are doing absolutley nothing to convince me – a gamer of over 20 years who has played on many many systems throughout those years – that I should get a Revolution.

On the whole, gamers are short-sighted and unthinking. The biggest response to any new hardware release from gamers always seems to be “Imagine playing GAME-X on this!”. Game-X is some old game that’s a favourite of the gamer. Ninety-five percent of the excited gamer feedback on the Revolution has been like this. Gamers have not used their imaginations to think up entirely new concepts – they’re getting excited about playing old games again with a bit of a twist. It’s a very sorry sight to witness – people demanding something new, just so they can do the same old things on it. But that’s the market. That’s the consumer demand. People, in spite of what they say, are showing they don’t want to do something widly new. They want the same old stuff with a lick of paint and an extra button somewhere. They show this whenever you see a gamer talk about how great some current generation (or older) title would be on this nice new hardware. There’s a big debate over the suitability of playing FPS games on the Revolution with equally strong arguments for and against. The problem is that it’s missing the point entirely – if the Revolution is insisting on being the brand new way to play then there’s going to be trouble. If the gamers are still thinking about playing FPS games and all those other established genres then there is no need for a revolution.

Does any entertainment need revolutionising anyway? Surely, if it did we’d all be watching movies with our 3D glasses on. We wouldn’t be reading books – we’d listen to audiobooks instead. TV hasn’t been revolutionised. Black and white evolved to colour. We’ve got more channels. We’ve got bigger screens. Nobody’s feeding images directly into our brains yet. Gaming isn’t broken, it doesn’t need to be fixed. Nintendo’s Revolution is the gaming equivalent of pop-up books. They’re pretty, everyone likes to flick through them – but you never get a deep, involved story and you grow out of them pretty quick. Nintendo won’t die because of the Revolution. They’ll remain admired by many. They’ve claimed on more than one occasion that they’re not competing with Sony or Microsoft and, to be fair, the Revolution proves that. I’m just not convinced that’s a good thing for me, gaming or Nintendo.

That’s about it, I’ve covered a lot of the points I’ve been pondering on. Bear in mind that everything I’ve written about is based on information that’s been released so far and on how I’ve seen the industry work over twenty years. I’m not speculating and I’m not trolling. My views are objective and based on facts. If this rubs you up the wrong way then, frankly, I couldn’t care less. If it encourages you to think a bit more then, frankly, I care a lot. Thanks for reading.

A brief note on double standards

Observe the image below:

Katamario

Let’s make some quick notes. Firstly, the characters displayed are from the Namco / Sony game Katamari Damacy. This game won a bunch of awards for its design and innovation. It has absolutely no affiliation or association with anything Nintendo. Now, note how Mario, Yoshi and Toad features (red cap, Yoshi’s head, Toad’s.. erm.. whatever) have been added ontop of the original Katamari characters and the iconic ‘Nintendo’ logo placed across the bottom of the image.

Got all that? Good.

So, what we’ve got is a deliberate rebranding of an innovative, original concept so that, to the casual observer it looks like a Nintendo product. Needless to say, this was not produced by Nintendo but by an individual.

Now, the thing that gets me is that typically I’ve seen this image get a big fat thumbs up from the type of people that I would describe as Nintendo fans. These same people think it’s an awfully clever idea to do this and give reasons like “Well, it’s the kind of idea that Nintendo would do, so it makes sense!”. Except they didn’t do it did they? So it doesn’t make sense, does it?

So, can someone tell me why these same folk are the ones that get so upset when they see something like Burnout or Timesplitters with an EA logo on it and say “Well, now that EA are publishing it, it’ll be rubbish”. Or when they cry when their exclusives like Resident Evil 4 get ported to other machines? That last one gets my goat the most. I mean, there they are, crowing about how you can ONLY do this on a Gamecube and that “Look at you sad PS2, Xbox owners without the amazing RE4!!!!” and then, OH NO, it gets ported to PS2 and the little kiddies get upset because they don’t want to share their toys. Ah diddums! You’ve still got your RE4, is it any worse now that it’s not an exclusive? Does it affect you? No. Well, yes – but only if you’re one of those fanboys that was winding everyone up in the first place, in which case, you deserve it (but not Burnout 3).

You’ll hear this more and more from me and others – gamers are responsible for the image of gaming. And it’s cases like the ones described above that will keep the culture in the dark ages and scoffed at by the non-gamers. Think before you open your mouths otherwise you’ll kill Nintendo faster than anyone else will.

The Digital Jihad

Last night I had a good chat with an old gaming buddy. It was one of those really enjoyable conversations that just coasts along with you both on the same wavelength and, before you know it, hours have passed by. Being gaming buddies we found ourselves talking about games and the current hot potato the Revolution.

During the course of the conversation we both hit upon a realisation. A truth. An epiphany.

Now, some might argue that I take games too seriously. That I’m too critical about what is just a hobby or pastime for many. I’d argue that I’m a huge fan of games and gaming culture and that my interest is so acute due to the 15 years I spent working in many different areas of the industry. Trash talking a company or dismissing a game means more to me because I understand exactly what was involved in getting it from the concept onto the shelf. So, I admit, I take gaming seriously, but I have very good reason to.

However devoted to gaming I am I generally don’t choose sides. I hold no loyalty to the manufacturer of a plastic box of circuits. Compared to some, my attitude towards games is mild. And it was this train of thought that led me to the realisation: gaming is a religion for many.

Words like ‘devotion’, ‘fanatic’, ‘worship’ and ‘faith’ leap into my head when I think of religion. Those same words can very easily be assigned to that very vocal and outspoken minority of gamers. Not being religious in the slightest and favouring facts and logic over faith and belief I’m not convinced of miracles or the ‘hand of God’. A problem I have with religious thinking is how those who practice it can eschew all logic and believe a totally unsubstantiated version of events. The most dedicated of believers are comitted to this type of thought and no application of logic or science will shift them from their perspective. Of course, games are not religion. After all, the very thing that drives a game – it’s programming – is written in purest logic! The industry is a scientifcally explainable entity. Trends can be plotted and every event in the history of gaming has a totally understandable explanation that can be backed up by facts. Games are a distraction, not a code by which a life can be lived or a set of standards than can be followed. Games are not religion.

But gamers have often demonstrated all the traits of the worst of religious fundamentalists. There are those, devoted to one of three Gods, worshiping their electronic idols and praying in the names of St. Miyamoto and others. As in the worst aspects of religion, their chosen path is the only path to true enlightenment. They are right in their belief as they have been promised entrance to gaming heaven, a digital nirvana. They don’t care if their God has let them down in the past – they may not even acknowledge any such fallacy can exist in their chosen belief. Opposing views or even the mention of other Gods will be met with outright hostility. Your logic and reason have no place in this discussion.

The degree to which this devotion is applied appears to be increasing. The timing of this isn’t a mystery – we’re on the verge of a new chapter and people are convinced that they’re going to be one step closer to the Holy Land. But the worst aspects of religious fervour are destroying the sense of community that gamers inhabit. Sides are clearly being taken and the zealots are preparing themselves for the digital jihad. Would they die for their cause? It seems so, yes. Their online presence is expendable. Let them go out a martyr or in a blaze of flaming glory as they rampage through their chosen community starting fights, stamping their feet and cutting down those who might dare to challenge their beliefs. If their online presence, their forum account gets banned as part of this cause then so be it. Sacrifices have to be made and if they must die for their cause then they can be reborn, their belief stronger than ever!

Ok, so maybe that’s over-dramatising the situation in some cases (and in some cases, it isn’t) but the parallels are plain to see. Obsessing over something at the expense of logic, facts, history and reason is as unhealthy as carrying out the actions in Doom or Quake in real life. I’m seeing more and more of this behaviour these days, so much so that I’m totally put off from participating in gaming communities. I don’t post in them and I now rarely read them due to the disdain I feel when I see topic after topic fuelled by unthinking and unreasoned fervour.

I don’t belong to the cult of Nintendo, Sony or Microsoft. But I see evidence that they exist.

Can videogames make you cry?

This article is based on that very question. More specifically it asks about gaming and whether it can bring a sense of emotion to the person playing.

I suppose that things like work, commuting and other things that truly fail to bring emotion to our lives are those which we find most bland. Games that make you feel nothing, not even anger, are probably the least successful.

The feeling of heroism, the obsession of most 14-year-old boys, is the basis of most games. […] In videogames, we often fight the bad guys and feel good about it. Whatever our critics may say, I think that’s worthy.

Unsurprisingly the results of a survey upon which the article is based shows Final Fantasy to be one of the most emotive games that gamers have experienced. Who can fail to have felt some sort of emotion at the end of Final Fantasy VII’s first CD? Or, for the more hardcore amongst you, how about when Palom and Porom sacrificed themselves in Final Fantasy II/IV?

The list of most affecting videogames from the article says plenty about what a crucial element emotion can be in making your game a success: Final Fantasy, Metal Gear Solid, Resident Evil, Halo, Silent Hill. Those are some heavyweight names.

Of course, you can apply a chicken and egg scenario to this. What about the smaller, less ‘popular with the casuals’ style games? Ico certainly makes the grade!

It’s clear that games that make you feel something are the ones you remember and are the ones that make their mark. Most recently for me, God of War made me feel something in games that I’ve not felt that many times since I first started playing. That of the sheer visceral thrill of power and literally feeling superhuman. The cunningness of the design in that this was a fallen character that you didn’t feel you cared for juxtaposed the fact that, as the gamer, it was your job to see him succeed in his quest. The gaming anti-hero.

Games haven’t made me cry. I’ve been elated, confused, angered, exhilerated, scared and determined by them though. I guess it’s that kind of emotional connection with a game that I always seek. Games that make that connection with me are the ones that elevate themselves above the normal and stand out.

Whilst writing this I’m trying to think of any ‘quick fix’, simple, shallow games that make that essential connection for me. Even the eternal Tetris doesn’t really offer that for me which is why I would probably play it less than any RPG I own even though my limited free time would lend itself far better to shifting abstract blocks than completing quests.

As the article indicates, Walt Disney wondered if animation could make an emotional connection with it’s audience. I think that, in the better animations, there is no question that it does. Today’s society will readily admit to that. In many respects, I think gaming finds itself being asked the same question today. I hope that in the future everyone will realise that it does – and not just in bad ways.

R|mail

I mentioned this site a few weeks back but I feel compelled to mention it again. R|mail, like all good things, is a simple idea executed well. It takes a website’s RSS feed and delivers it to an email you specify.

R|mail website

All you need to do is provide the address of an RSS feed and then tell the site which email address you want the feed sent to. An email will be sent to that address asking the email owner to confirm their subscription request. After that, any new posts that appear on the site that the feed is for will be delivered to the email address supplied – including any images and hyperlinks. It really couldn’t be simpler.

There are a number of ways to subscribe to a site’s RSS feed that vary from simple (such as Firefox’s Livebookmarks concept) to moderately complex solutions that involve using dedicated newsfeed readers. Depending on how many sites or feeds you read you may want a different solution.

Of course, one of the sweetest things about R|mail is that it’s possible to provide a direct link to the second step of the subscription process. Here, allow me to demonstrate:

Subscribe to koffdrop.com at R|mail

Clicking on that link will assume you want to subscribe to this site and take you straight to the ‘please supply your email for this feed’ page. So, if you haven’t already done so, why not ensure you never miss an episode of your favourite show and subscribe to koffdrop.com? 🙂

Special mention and thanks must go to Randy Charles Morin who updated the R|mail database so that subscribers to the old koffdrop.com feed would get the new koffdrop.com feed automatically. I have absolutely no idea how he knew the feed had changed. I can only assume he either reads koffdrop.com or watches every one of the 3,000+ feeds R|mail covers like a hawk and pounces on any issues that might occur.

However he does it, it’s fantastic service at a price that can’t be beat and it makes R|mail very easy to recommend.

Welcome, again

Hi there, welcome to the new-look koffdrop.com! You’ll find this version a little more functional than the previous as the sidebar to the right will testify. If you’re wondering where all the old stuff went you can find it here.

As far as functionality is concerned, you’ll be able to find posts created on the new site by a number of different searching methods such as date, category, month or by the search function at the top of the page. Try hovering over the bold dates in the calendar to get an idea of what I mean.

Please note that if you subscribed to koffdrop.com via RSS or R|mail then it’s unlikely that they will work any longer. My apologies for the inconvenience.

What a disappointment

You know, I’ve said it many times, but I have to say that the sheer stubborness of gamers (yes, I’m generalising) is quite breathtaking. You’ve got the EA haterz and the Nintendo loverz and, frankly, not a lot in between. I knew that September 16th was going to be a pain in the ass because, regardless of what was shown, this big surge of “OMFG BEST THING EVAR!!!11” was going to spread across the internet like a cancer.

Now, I happen to be someone who lost faith in Nintendo over a decade ago and have since looked at them and their actions very critically. Instead of eagerly chugging down any line of spin that Iwata or Miyamoto give, I choose to question it.

It seems clear that just because I don’t want to believe in fairies, Father Christmas or Nintendo Magic that I am wrong. Nope, it’s not that I’m expressing my own opinion. It’s not that it swims against the current. All negotiations are over. A decision must be made: Koffdrop is wrong. Oh, and he’s a fool, doesn’t know anything about gaming, has no sense of humour, yadda yadda yadda.

You know, if gamers (generalising again) could demonstrate just a hint of reason or maturity then you’d be such nicer people.

[sigh]

On a more uplifting note I stumbled across a fantastic website the other day. I’m subject to pretty strict rules about sharing data at work. These rules are often enforced by prohibiting internet activity such as using instant messengers. I’ve been scraping by with the browser based version of MSN but it only serves one medium. Meebo is the answer. It’s very early days but it covers the essentials – you can login, get your contacts and speak to them. This site is definitely one to watch.

And finally koffdrop.com will be levelling up! A site upgrade is likely to occur later on this week. Watch this space.

A word to the not-so-wise

If you come here with a closed mind then you will not enjoy your stay. If you cannot tolerate an alternative point of view then do not come here. If you feel you can browbeat my opinions into something you prefer the sound of then you’re in for nothing but disappointment.

If you have something constructive to say, say it. If you have nothing useful to say then head to one of those other, less challenging, places where everyone thinks the same things and finds the same things interesting.

Any further unnecesarily inflammatory comments will be deleted and details will be logged.

Koffdrop.com doesn’t march to the beat of your drum. Accept it or move on.

Have a nice day.

I prefer the fakes

With the world and their nintendog (do you see what I did there?) screaming about the Great Big Reveal and with me being known around these parts as a pretty vocal Nintendo cynic I think it only natural to give you my thoughts. Heck, this is my site, I don’t have to justify myself to the likes of you!

Firstly, it’s appearance wasn’t what I (or anybody?) was expecting. Nintendo’s clearly got a hardon for Apple right now and I guess we should have expected something like this when we saw that slab of plastic they showed us at E3. How could we all be so dumb? It makes perfect sense!

Another big deal is that, “OMFG! you turn it sideways and it’s a NES controller! GENIUS!”. Holy crap indeed. Talk about doing the unexpected eh? I mean, if it worked for the N-gage it’s going to work for Nintendo, right? I mean what’s the deal with focusing a big chunk of your next-gen do-or-die console planning on a 20 year old controller. A basic, fugly and just plain uncomfortable controller at that? What am I saying! It’s Nintendo – 90% of their selling strategy is to make you play their 20 year old games again. It makes perfect sense!

Oh, and It’s a 3D pointing device. You know something? My finger is a 3D pointing device too! I can see a lot of DS stylus control mentality crossing over into Nintendo’s new machine and I wouldn’t be at all surprised to see Nintendo produce big screen versions of Nintendogs, Kirby and Meteos to milk their IP and justify their design at the same time. It makes perfect sense!

But what about the games? Well, we know that Nintendo have this one covered in their typical fashion as all those old Nintendo games are going to be available for Revolution. Good news if you’ve ever felt that recent Nintendo consoles have suffered from a lack of support. And you like old games. That you can already get for free. Yes, well, ahem, as for new games – nope. Still no word. Oh, Iwata showed off a reconfigured version of the Gamecube’s Metroid Prime 2 with the controller. So that’s another old game on the new hardware. Jolly good!

So, allow me to present some possible Nintendo Revolution games that follow both their typical release strategy and would showcase their controller:

Super Mario Maestro ™
Princess Peach has been kidnapped and held prisoner in Ludwig Von Koopa’s music-o-tron! Oh noes! Mario must save her by using his virtual conductors baton. Wave your controller around and Mario waves his arms around JUST LIKE ANDRE PREVIN!

Lucasarts and Nintendo Present: Super Mario Jedi ™
Feel the force with Revolution! Fight lightsaber battles and collect mushrooms and stars by wielding your virtual sword around wildy and bastardised versions of mutually whored Lucas and Nintendo IPs. You can even play as Jar Jar!

Super Mario World Series Koopa-Snooker ™
Sporty Mario is back! He can dance! He can Strike! He can sink putts! He can ace his rivals! Now, Nintendo gives Mario time on the green baize and a 6-year contract promoting Embassy cigarettes! Use your amazing controller to aim the perfect shot, screw back and snooker your rivals. Don’t forget your spin!

Super Mario Kart: Back Seat Driver edition ™
ALL NEW! The legendary Super Mario Kart series returns for another bashing of the same 15 year old premise. But you don’t care! Now you can be WITH Mario and his friends actually IN the kart! Why control steering directly when you can virtually stand behind your driver and agressively point to areas on the road or Super Mario Map ™ and tell Mario that he should have taken that right turn you told him about.

Super Mario Minesweeper ™
Erm..

Well, you get the idea. I mean, why allow folks the means to play videogamings most recent stunning successes such as GTA when you can create a niche market within a niche market? It makes perfect sense!

And let’s not forget the fact that cunning old Iwata has hedged his bets by suggesting that expansions for the controller are a possibility. In other words, if they’ve screwed it up, they can fix it later. Oh and they can make special peripherals to go with Nintendo games (such as the tilt sensors in GBA games) that no third party can afford to do. Nintendo were right when they said they didn’t expect much 3rd party support. They won’t get it.

And finally, Iwata holds his Great White Hope aloft and it says only one thing to me. See what you think:


Nintendo: Fucking you up the ass since the 1980’s